Viewing items with Tag: "school"

Not so long ago Japan was in trouble with China for glossing over Japans wartime aggression regarding The Rape of Nanjing in the 1930s.

Now Japan is off again trying to sweep more of its less proud history under the tatami. They of all people should know that tatami isnt that great for hiding history, and trying to hide these 'incidents' as they call them, is only going to draw more attention to them.

Here are some links to more papers on the textbook war and post-war Okinawa, thanks to Mike over at ShigaJet:

The Battle of Okinawa in Japanese History Books

more papers on post-war Okinawa


and here are some quotes from the article at New York times:

The Ministry of Education ordered publishers to delete passages stating that the Imperial Army ordered civilians to commit mass suicide during the Battle of Okinawa, as the island was about to fall to American troops in the final months of the war.

During the 1945 battle, during which one quarter of the civilian population was killed, the Japanese Army showed indifference to Okinawa’s defense and safety. Japanese soldiers used civilians as shields against the Americans, and persuaded locals that victorious American soldiers would go on a rampage of killing and raping. With the impending victory of American troops, civilians committed mass suicide, urged on by fanatical Japanese soldiers.

Another favorite pasttime of the Classless ALT is helping the English teachers grade papers.

In my last hurricane of grading, a couple funny things popped up.

First of all, one of the students referred to Harry Potter as "Horny Potter" which would not have been so funny if it was not completely accidental, as they just happened to mistake the a for an o and made one of the r's a tad too long.

Thanks to genshiyagyu for this quality little comic strip:

"I wanted to share with you all a fresh perspective on using the textbook. It's really changed my outlook on studying Japanese." Check the full comic strip here

Well, its about friggin time!

After a string of attacks on school children in the Kyoto area by crazed perverts with knives (who probably practiced first on nearby shrubbery- I mean lets face it, these guys' cheese has definitely slid off thier crackers), the Kyoto board of education has finally decided to be proactive and has come up with a FANTASTIC plan to prevent these attackers from ever nearly harming another school child again.

The incredible idea: A stick! Now now, don't shrug it off just yet. Its not just any stick. This is a stick meticulously constructed of genuine PVC with an American Football goal looking thing on one end, designed to stave off evil until help arrives.

The genius here is in its simplicity folks. Simplicity and the inherent fear invoking power of sticks. These miniature football goals, conveniently located in the shokuinshitsu, or teachers room at every school (of course the very place a school invader is least likely to end up), are desigend to allow the small children to hold off the lunatic invaders at sticks length until help arrives in the form of equally loony police officers, who are, we can only assume, armed with even longer sticks, and possibly some kind of food to distract the invaders while some even more loony inventor designs a trap in which to catch the unsuspecting victim as he feeds. One step at a time here folks, one step at a time.

Useless crime fighting paraphenalia, you ask? Not at this price! We were given a wonderful demonstration by the Kyoto Sensei himself, dressed, like all evil men, in a black ski mask (these kids will be terrified if they ever incidentally stumble upon a ski-jo). Afterwards, I was given the inside scoop on the incredible bargain these schools are getting.

Each stick, which could easily be constructed with items in most peoples' back yards for about 15 dollars, cost the schools only 3 man yen, roughly 300 bucks a pop. Now thats what I call a bargain. Deeeeeeeee-liscious! And, fortunately for the students, (of which roughly half are strong enough to even lift the stick), each school is required to have at least two or three, which are very strategically placed in the same inaccessible corner at every school.

If you don't believe me, Kyoto ALTs, check your shokuinshitsus. That thing you have oft seen and never grasped the meaning of? Yup, thats "the stick."

So hats off to you Japan! When my friends suggest that you might be involved in frittering away the education budget on useless junk, I'll just disagree, and think of your ingenious crime-fighting technology!

Apparently its called a "Thorn Crotch." Check this article out from Boing Boing.

Well hello there dudes and dudettes,

This being the first post on "Classless," I'll only take a moment to clue everyone in on the gradual degeneration of thought as the day progresses and the mind wanders in what is one of the most challenging phenomena in the life of an ALT: the classless day. Sure, the schedule says "meetings" but thats just code for "We wanna watch you squirm in boredom."

Right, this post should introduce the new (improved?) cynical Joe well enough: clubs in Japanese schools.

I'll start with a brief introduction to Japanese clubs which run from Elementary to Senior High School:
- practice EVERY night after school, sometimes as late as 11pm
- you are practicing your sport, not playing it.
- you chose this sport, not that one - deal with it!
- all this... but Japans national teams still suck...

What happened today in Elementary school just has to be recorded. I was teaching the 3rd year kids (7-8 year olds) about body parts, using a game where I point to a part of my body, they raise their hands and say what it is, and get to draw that part of the body on their torsoe (on the blackboard - kind of a race to get the funniest complete body game)

So anyway, I gave them a bonus question, and asked them for something I hadnt taught them yet - I pointed at my finger and said "Whats this?" - all of the kids were puzzled and had no idea, expect in the corner of my eye just a few metres away, the cutest of little girls had her hand timidly half raised, and so I pointed to her and asked what the word was.

She then spoke in the cutest of cute voices, really quietly... "penis?"

Obviously, I had mis-heard. There is no way she just said what I thought she'd said. Most young Japanese boys know the word, but they always pronounce it "pen-nis", whereas this girl spoken it with perfect enunciation. So... I must have been wrong... I requested the answer once more "sorry, can you say it again louder?"

Sure enough, "penis" - in a more confident voice this time. Now I died inside, and had to physically fight the laughter building towards my cheeks, yet managed to contain myself enough to look at her and say "im sorry, thats not right" and continue with the game. The next 5 minutes were tough, but I managed to get through the class without a scene

This one's been around, but worth revisiting. Having been an English teacher in Japan, it's good to remember that high school kids everywhere write goofy-ass stuff:


6. Her vocabulary was as bad as, like, whatever.

14. Long separated by cruel fate, the star-crossed lovers raced across the grassy field toward each other like two freight trains, one having left Cleveland at 6:36 p.m. traveling at 55 mph, the other from Topeka at 4:19 p.m. at a speed of 35 mph.

18. Even in his last years, Granddad had a mind like a steel trap, only one that had been left out so long it had rusted shut.

25. He was deeply in love. When she spoke, he thought he heard bells, as if she were a garbage truck backing up.



See the full list at The 25 Funniest Analogies (Collected by High School English Teachers).

In the land of origami, a group of Elementary school children have seen their dream become a reality as they launched the giant structure to fly over 40 metres. The project was run by the Hiroshima Prefectural Assembly for Youth Development, which every year tries to make school childrens imaginative dreams come true (a bit like Jim'll fix it). Source All-Japan Blogspot.

This year Ikeda Tomohiro, a sixth grader at Minami Elementary School in Fuchu City, and four friends sent in their dream: "We want to make the biggest paper airplane in the world. Tomohiro loves origami (paper folding) and making things. In October 2005 his dream was selected to come true, and the paper airplane project began.

A Nagoya man is accused of stealing over 5,000 pairs of boys and girls shoes from local schools. He stored the shoes in a Nagoya warehouse after getting off to the smell.


Story from Mainichi Daily News:

"I was enjoying their smell," Masashi Kamata, 28, a resident of Moriyama-ku, Nagoya, was quoted as telling investigators. "Indoor shoes for school sexually stimulate me. I couldn't throw away the shoes I obtained."